chelsea.Shit ransomIt was in one of those plastic bags that newspapers are delivered in so they don’t get wet in the rain, sitting on top of the trash can in…Jan 31, 2021Jan 31, 2021
chelsea.I once ate a bag of chips while someone broke up with me.It wasn’t one of the proudest moments of my life, but I’d be lying if said I didn’t think of it from time to time and smile. He invited me…Aug 29, 20191Aug 29, 20191
chelsea.“If I die here's what you need to do.”My mother is going on a cruise. We're sitting on the front porch and she's telling me for the sixth time where all the necessary paperwork…Jun 1, 2019Jun 1, 2019
chelsea.The emergency roomMy mouth tasted like the vomit the woman in the bed next to me was spouting out of her mouth into a blue emesis bag. She would apologize in…Oct 3, 2017Oct 3, 2017
chelsea.Random anecdote about masturbatingWhen I was younger I thought masturbating exclusively involved motorcycles. I didn’t know any better. I hung around neighborhood kids who…Mar 9, 2017Mar 9, 2017
chelsea.Thursday thoughts in no specific sequenceWhen I come across a word I don’t know when I’m reading I write it down with the intention of looking it up later. It is a good idea in…Feb 24, 2017Feb 24, 2017
